We Don’t Do Sleepovers
In our family, we don’t do sleepovers with just anyone. It’s not you—it’s us. I have trust issues when it comes to others being responsible for my precious babies.
The invitation to stay the night is appreciated, but if I don’t know you, I don’t trust you. Trust takes time—especially when it involves my children. I’ve seen too much in my career, read too many heartbreaking stories, and watched too many crime shows to casually say, “Sure, you can have my child overnight while she’s sleeping and at her most vulnerable.” No way.
Even if your intentions are pure and the situation is completely innocent, I still have the responsibility, as their mother, to protect my children. And this is just one way I do that.
Once, my oldest daughter was invited to a birthday party that included a sleepover—in a cabin, in the woods. We were fine with her attending the party itself, but when we read about the overnight camping part, we immediately said no. We decided to pick her up before they left for the woods.
We had never even met the friend’s parents. I only knew the mom’s name because my daughter told me, and I ended up finding her on social media. Her profile included anti-Christian posts that unsettled me—and certainly didn’t help my already-existing trust issues.
So, our daughter went to the birthday party to celebrate with her friend, and we picked her up before they headed to the cabin.
I’m not saying anything would have happened. But I can sleep at night knowing that we did what we could to protect her from anything that could have.
And we didn’t make this decision without talking to our daughter first. We sat her down and asked how she felt about the whole thing—being in a cabin in the woods with people she didn’t know well. Her expression said it all: absolutely not. She understood our concerns and completely agreed with our decision to pick her up before the overnight part.
Open communication with our kids is so important—but it also needs to be age-appropriate. We didn’t scare her with the worst-case scenarios or tell her all the things we were protecting her from. We just asked how she felt and explained that because we didn’t know her friend’s parents, we weren’t comfortable with her staying the night.
Our children don’t need every detail to feel safe. They need boundaries, love, and parents who are willing to make the hard calls, even when it’s unpopular. Sometimes protecting them means saying “no,” even when it’s awkward or inconvenient. We may not always get it perfect, but we’ll never regret choosing caution over risk when it comes to the safety of our kids.
“Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith; be courageous; be strong. Do everything in love.”
—1 Corinthians 16:13–14 (NIV)
This verse reminds us that being cautious and protective isn’t fearful—it’s loving. Being on guard is a form of stewardship over the lives God has entrusted to us.
